Home > Author > David Clawson
1 " I admit, I bear my share of the responsibility for their getting it all wrong, so I guess I’m just going to tell this story as if you knew nothing, because, in reality, even if you read every single article published up to the moment of the big announcement, about the truth, you do know nothing. "
― David Clawson , My Fairy Godmother is a Drag Queen
2 " Every time he said those words it was like a supernova of joy exploding inside me. I just didn’t yet know that supernovas burn so brightly because a catastrophe is taking place. That lesson would come later. "
3 " I just felt like . . . me. And whatever “me” meant, that was perfectly fine and absolutely enough. Everyone should feel that kind of peace and self-acceptance far more often than I think most of us do. "
4 " Are they always so mean?” I asked. “It’s the oldest story in the book— the bullied become the bullies. "
5 " Child, I am taking you to The Autumnal Ball.”“The . . . but . . . but . . . I don’t have a ticket.”“Don’t worry about it.”“But how—”“Don’t worry about it.”“But I don’t have a thousand dollars for—”“I said, don’t worry about it.”“But how can I not worry about it? Worrying is what I do! About everything!” With an unexpectedly calm smile, Coco put I finger to my lips. “And that’s why you need a fairy godmother. For the rest of the night you’re not allowed to worry about anything. You have one, and only one, responsibility. To have a dream come true and have the sweetass time of your sweetass life. Do you understand me? "
6 " but the human heart has a bad habit of being hopeful. "
7 " Happiness can be a dangerous thing; it can make you greedy for more. "
8 " I’m always amazed by how readily people judge the right and wrong of things they know only from the outside. Honestly, it kind of pisses me off. "
9 " I have a theory that he’s not actually as stupid as he likes to act, because often he’ll play the stupidity card in a really smart way . "
10 " I will say this about that moment when you realize your worst nightmare has proven to be reality— it can be oddly comforting. After all, once you’ve hit rock bottom and lived, there’s only one place you can go, and that’s up. "
11 " They say that it’s always darkest before the dawn, but sometimes it’s really darkest the moment you realize a dream was just a dream. "
12 " Being homosexual isn’t just about sex. It’s about who we have emotional romantic connections with, whose arms we actually feel at peace in, who completes the—dare I say it—fairy tale of what romantic and domestic bliss is for that individual. "
13 " Shit, you probably think RuPaul is a natural blonde. "
14 " Child, the only fish I eat is at Red Lobster. Can I get an amen? "
15 " Ohgodohgodohgod, whywhywhy, killmenowkillmenowkillmenow, was about all my brain was capable of thinking. "
