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21 " I didn't just wake up one morning and think, "I'm a boy!" It sort of crept up on me and tapped me on the shoulder a few times before I started to pay attention I began to think that the word "girl" didn't quite fit me. It was like a shoe that was too small -- it pinched me. "
― Cat Clarke , The Pants Project
22 " You don't deserve Jack.You don't deserve to sleep.You don't deserve to live. "
― Cat Clarke
23 " Your brother is hilarious! And possibly gayEntangled by Cat Clarke "
24 " I won't ever give up. "
― Cat Clarke , Entangled
25 " The thought of going to sleep forever was delicious. I was so very tired. "
― Cat Clarke , Undone
26 " He drives a newish-looking silver van. Man in van = obviously dodgy. "
27 " I smile. On the inside though, so no one can see. A secret smile just for me. "
28 " I remember. All of it. And it hurts. More than I'd ever thought possible.I know where I am and what I've done and why I can't move or speak or open my eyes. And I'm scared.It was all a terrible mistake.I'd like not to be here. I'd like to go home now.Please.Please "
29 " They had no idea that normal didn't exist for me anymore. Normal had been smashed on the rocks beneath the bridge. "
30 " Mothers can be so dense. Just act like you approve of what we're doing. We'll soon do the exact opposite, just to spite you. "
31 " You have to understand that not everything in the world is black and white. "
― Cat Clarke , Torn
32 " I never lost the certainty that he was the perfect boy. The perfect boy for me anyway. I just tried not to think about it, because it made me ache inside. "
33 " It's when I'm alone that the doubt sets in. It's been that way for years. As long as there are people around, I can pretend that everything's OK. But I need that audience to pretend for, otherwise it doesn't work. Alone, I'm not that easy to fool. "
34 " Kai, are you sure you’re OK? You’re acting a little weird.’He kissed me on the forehead. ‘Ah, Jemima! Weirdness is one of my many charms.’ Then he grabbed me in a bear hug and squeezed so hard I thought I might pass out. "
35 " It struck me that there would always be a part of him that didn’t (and shouldn’t) belong to me. It’s all too easy to think that the people you care about go into some kind of suspended animation when you’re not around. That they only truly come to life when they’re with you, and don’t really exist without you. I mean, you know that’s not true (you’re not stupid, after all), but that other part of their life is kind of irrelevant – to you at least. "
36 " I hugged my knees to my chest, desperately trying to hold myself together so I didn’t splinter into a thousand pieces. If I let go, no one would ever be able to put the pieces together again. "
37 " Every good story deserves a happy ending – it’s a basic rule of storytelling. The boy next door certainly shouldn’t die. "
38 " It's too weird to think about - how death seems to rewrite all the rules. People who never talked to each other can suddenly cry together. People who used to be close can hardly bear to be in the same room. "
39 " I wish she knew that there are other options besides “complete and utter breakdown” and “plastic smile, everything's fine." There's a middle ground, waiting to be found. "
― Cat Clarke , The Lost and the Found
40 " And he could never understand that I could never feel OK again as long as I knew she was hurting. "
― Cat Clarke , A Kiss in the Dark