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1 " We have to be able to endure bullying, stonewalling, and the anger of the other negotiator without faltering. We should be prepared to propose ultimatums and hold firm even when we see that our stance is making the other negotiator frustrated or unhappy. "
― Linda Babcock , Ask for It: How Women Can Use the Power of Negotiation to Get What They Really Want
2 " Presenting her case calmly and positively, even in the face of his angry outburst, won the rest. “His first instinct was to bully me,” she said. “But when he saw that that wasn’t going to work, he settled down and we mapped out a plan to get me started with my own clients. "
― Linda Babcock , Women Don't Ask: Negotiation and the Gender Divide
3 " People who were instructed to focus on their targets in practice negotiations consistently negotiated better agreements than people who focused on their reservation values instead. The people who focused on their targets did two things differently. They asked for more at the outset, and they hung in there a little longer. They resisted agreeing until they received an offer that was close to their goal. In one study, participants who focused on their targets reached agreements that were 13 percent higher than those achieved by people negotiating about the same issues who focused instead on the minimum they would accept. "
4 " Focus on the interests and goals you have in common, trade things you care about less for things that matter to you more, and think of yourself and the other negotiator as partners in problem solving. "
5 " Focus on your target and fight the impulse to concede too quickly. "
6 " In the middle of a negotiation, what they planned to ask for suddenly seems ridiculous, excessive, too much. If this happens to you, hold on tight to the information you’ve collected, and don’t suddenly revise your goals downward. Focus on your target and fight the impulse to concede too quickly. After all your hard work, don’t make the mistake of walking away too soon. "
7 " even when women can imagine changes that might increase their productivity at work, their happiness at home, or their overall contentment with their lives, their suppressed sense of entitlement creates real barriers to their asking. Because they’re not dissatisfied with what they have and not sure they deserve more, women often settle for less. "
8 " Choose something big that you think it’s really not okay to want, something you think would make you seem greedy or selfish if you asked for it. And make sure it’s something you really do want. Then ask for it. Whether you get it or not, fight your impulse to apologize or feel bad. Tell yourself it’s okay to want what you want. Combat the impulse to scale back out of fear that you’re overreaching. "
9 " We found that the problem has a profound impact on the lives of women outside the workplace too. Married women who work full-time still perform two-thirds of the housework and childcare at home. They enjoy far less leisure time than their male partners, and—unlike men with families—experience a dramatic upward spike in their stress levels at the end of the workday as they approach their “second shift.” Constant stress of this sort can produce sustained elevated levels of stress hormones in one’s blood, a significant risk factor for heart disease, diabetes, cancer, osteoporosis, and depression, some of the major diseases that afflict women. "
10 " for women. These results suggest that men are asking for things they want and initiating negotiations much more "
11 " Judging the musical ability of a top-ranked musician auditioning for a symphony orchestra might seem pretty straightforward. Some people are clearly superior musicians and presumably any expert can tell the difference. As it turns out, this is far from the case. Two economists found that the use of a screen to hide the identity, and thus the gender, of auditioning musicians increased by a full 50 percent the probability that a woman would advance in the audition process. Using a screen increased the likelihood that a woman would win an orchestra seat by 250 percent. "
