Home > Author > David David Katzman
1 " My biggest objection to Marxism has been the presumption that industry should exist at all. I think the unstoppable juggernaut which is global warming demonstrates that processing natural materials on an industrial scale is a suicidal practice. "
― David David Katzman
2 " Touching is just electrons repelling. Nothing can touch. Ever. "
― David David Katzman , A Greater Monster
3 " It makes sense that your response to a bad break-up line would be to set someone on fire," I responded. "Fire is magical to us because it embodies the passage of time. We can never grasp time because it is invisible, unreachable and continually slipping from our grasp. Do we live in the present? How can we? The present is infinitesimally small. It can't contain human action. We teeter on the brink between our assumed future...where we will be in moments to come...and our memory of the past...where we think we just were. The present doesn't exist in a comprehensible way. Similarly, fire is something we can neither grasp nor touch, yet it has a clear effect...the decay and collapse of life, the acceleration of entropy. Thus when we stand mesmerized by fire, we are actually mesmerized by our own mortality. "
4 " Without a mask to shape us, what would we face anyone with? "
5 " Realization: We render time by stitching together moments--flipping pages in the book of consciousness presents a continuous stream. Our senses too slow to realize the separation of moments, like a strand of pearls through eternity.Time is terrifying, time is unspeakable. Clock-time lies down between moments ... but distance warps with velocity, time bends with velocity. Frames of reference. Are not absolute. Are selfish. A private reality. Clocks have a life of their own. Framed by references. "
6 " Lies erase. Lies are power. Power to be had by you. Truth is relative, no? Power defeats truth, paper, scissors. Are you faux real? "
7 " one might call this state ["youth" (but that seems inaccurate)] "remembering" but memory is quite eerie like caging a dream, and when I recite the rote details the real event slithers further from me because the telling of it reshapes it, every touch alters it, until it is unrecognizable except as a story [a doppelganger (immediately not myself) a writhing poltergeist summoned to snap at me from the darkness~or benign but vague, like a whisper making it better to remain silent, but I can't~the past is a narrative (that writes us) immanent in the present [proving there is cause and effect in the immaterial (the mythic becomes carnal by leaving marks on the body)] symbol by symbol, building up invisible scars "
8 " I'm a vegetarian, you see, not because I love animals, but because I hate plants. "
― David David Katzman , Death by Zamboni
9 " The phone rang. By the caller ID she saw it was Hal from the Wizard temp agency. “Hey Valerie,” he said. “Oh, hey Hal. What can I do for you?” she replied. “Oh, there’s this thing. Before I tell you about it, are you free right now to go out? I know it’s short notice, but rather than explain the whole thing to you and then find out you’re busy with something else I just want to ask upfront. Because explaining it to you would be a waste of both of our time if you aren’t available.” “No, sure, yeah. No problem. I could go on something now. I’m not too busy.” “Okay, great. We got a call from the police. They’ve got some crazy thing going on downtown. Something to do with a multi-dimensional demon spirit possessing buildings and some gaping holes in reality or something like that. I don’t really have all the details because the police officer who called me was cut off mid-sentence. He seemed to come down with some kind of horrible case of screaming. Something about clawing his eyeballs out. Anyway, some other officer picked up the phone and said that their regular on-duty wizard was sick and to send someone to meet them near the downtown plaza. You can’t miss the three story tall blob-demon-thing tearing up the city streets, he said.” “Okay. Is it the usual hourly?” “Because it’s for the city rather than a private business, we give them a discounted rate. So it’s $15 an hour. You don’t have to take it.” “No, that’s okay. I need the money. "
― David David Katzman , The Kickstarter Letters
10 " Time is our mortal enemy because it makes us mortal. Yet without time we wouldn't exist. And it would be damn hard to figure out what's on TV. Two-minute eggs would be right out. "
11 " ...a mini-hearse. It had the practicality of a mini-van and the handy carrying capacity of a hearse combined. If you get annoyed with your kids at soccer practice, you can always kill them on the way home and take them directly to the cemetery. "
