James Finn Garner QUOTES

4 " The wolf said, "You know, my dear, it isn't safe for a little girl to walk through these woods alone."

Red Riding Hood said, "I find your sexist remark offensive in the extreme, but I will ignore it because of your traditional status as an outcast from society, the stress of which has caused you to develop your own, entirely valid, worldview. Now, if you'll excuse me, I must be on my way. "

― James Finn Garner , Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

6 " Red Riding Hood screamed, not out of alarm at the wolf's apparent tendency toward cross-dressing, but because of his willful invasion of her personal space. "

― James Finn Garner , Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

8 " Rapunzel rode to the city and rented a room in a building that had real stairs. She later established the non-profit Foundation for the Free Proliferation of Music and cut off her hair for a fund-raising auction. She sang for free in coffee houses and art galleries for the rest of her days, always refusing to exploit for money other people's desire to hear her sing. "

― James Finn Garner , Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

10 " Old King Cole was a merrie old soul, A merrie old soul was he. He called for his pipe and called for his bowl And toked away, mon, for his irie. "

― James Finn Garner , Politically Correct Bedtime Stories

12 " At the house of bricks, the wolf again banged on the door and shouted, "Little pigs, little pigs, let me in!" This time in response, the pigs sang songs of solidarity and wrote letters of protest to the United Nations. "

― James Finn Garner , Politically Correct Bedtime Stories