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Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls QUOTES

Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls QUOTES

1 " Owl love you forever "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

2 " ...but wasn't everyone in England supposed to be a detective? Wasn't every crime, no matter how complex, solved in a timely fashion by either a professional or a hobbyist? That's the impression you get from British books and TV shows. Sherlock Holmes, Miss Marple, Hetty Wainthropp, Inspector George Gently: they come from every class and corner of the country. There's even Edith Pargeter's Brother Cadfael, a Benedictine monk who solved crimes in twelfth-century Shrewsbury. No surveillance cameras, no fingerprints, not even a telephone, and still he cracked every case that came his way. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

3 " It bothered me that the bag bothered me more than head did, but what are you going to do? A person doesn't conciously choose what he focuses on. Those things choose you, and, once they do, nothing, it seems, can shake them. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

4 " Nobody likes having a problem, but having a convoluted, bureaucratic one is even more galling. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

5 " It’s not lost on me that I’m so busy recording life, I don’t have time to really live it. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

6 " There are things you forget naturally-computer passwords, your father's continuing relationship with life-and then there are things you can't forget that you wish you could. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

7 " Neither were we allowed to choose what we ate. I have a friend whose seven-year-old will only consider something if it's white. Had I tried that, my parents would have said, "You're on," and served me a bowl of paste, followed by joint compound, and, maybe if I was good, some semen. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

8 " You tell yourself that if you traveled alone to Europe this summer, you could surely do the same thing next year, and the year after that. Of course you don’t, though, and the next thing you know you’re an aging, unemployed elf so desperate for love you spend your evening mooning over a straight alcoholic. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

9 " You look like some cousin of mine.” The latter would work only if you were Asian, but even then it’s a little creepy, the implication being “the cousin I have always wanted to undress and ejaculate on. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

10 " The rules were just different back then, especially in regard to corporal punishment. Not only could you hit your own children, but you could also hit other people’s. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

11 " Fly enough, and you learn to go brain-dead when you have to. It’s sort of like time travel. One minute you’re bending to unlace your shoes,and the next thing you know you’re paying fourteen dollars for a fruit cup, wondering, How did I get here? "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

12 " If you don’t think a mental patient has the right to bring a sawed-off shotgun to the church where his ex-girlfriend is getting married, you’re part of the problem. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

13 " It’s common to be misread by people who don’t know you. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

14 " When you're young it's easy to believe that such a opportunity will come again, maybe even a better one. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

15 " We’re forever blaming the airline industry for turning us into monsters: it’s the fault of the ticket agents, the baggage handlers, the slowpokes at the newsstands and the fast food restaurants. But what if this is who we truly are, and the airport’s just a forum that allows us to be our real selves, not just hateful but gloriously so? "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

16 " I’m not sure how long I lay there, blissed-out and farting. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

17 " On Maui, one November, Hugh and I went swimming, and turned to find a gigantic sea turtle coming up between us. As gentle as a cow she was, and with a cow’s dopey, almost lovesick expression on her face. That, to me, was worth the entire trip, worth my entire life, practically. For to witness majesty, to find yourself literally touched by it—isn’t that what we’ve all been waiting for? "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

18 " The man spoke with an accent, and though I couldn’t exactly place it, I knew that he was poor. His voice had snakes in it. And dysentery, and mangoes. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

19 " There’s a short circuit between my brain and my tongue, thus “Leave me the fuck alone” comes out as “Well, maybe. Sure. I guess I can see your point.” This, "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls

20 " Look,” I’ll say to Jesus, “enough is enough. I suggest we nail some boards together and have ourselves an old-fashioned crucifixion. "

― David Sedaris , Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls