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1 " Stairs," Valkyrie said, disappointed." Not just ordinary stairs," Skulduggery told her as he led the way down. " Magic stairs." " Really?" " Oh, yes." She followed him into the darkness. " How are they magic?" " They just are." " In what way?" " In a magicky way." She glared at the back of his head. " They aren't magic at all, are they?" " Not really. "
2 " Skulduggery." " Fletcher." Fletcher stuck out his hand. Skulduggery observed it for a moment." I'm sorry, what are we doing now?" " Shaking hands," Fletcher said. " Like adults. I just want you to know that this past year has changed me. I've grown, as a person. I'm not the same Fletcher you used to know." You look a lot like him." " Well, yeah, but-" " And you have the same ridiculous hair." " Can we just shake hands?" " Of course we can," Skulduggery said, and they shook. " Now what?" " I, uh...I don't really know. What do adults usually do after they shake hands?" " Generally, the first thing they do is let go." " Oh, right," Fletcher said, and Skulduggery took his hand back. " So, Skulduggery, how have you been? You're looking well. That's a really nice tie." It's blue." " And such a nice shade." Skulduggery looked at Valkyrie. " You promised me he wouldn't be annoying. "
3 " I should go in alone," Valkyrie said, speaking loudly to be heard. " If we both go in, it'll look to official." " So I'll just stay out here?" Skulduggery asked. " But what'll I do? There's no one to talk to. It's boring." " You're standing on the roof of a train," Valkyrie pointed out. " If you find this boring, you really need your head examined. Just wait here. I'll do what has to be done and I'll be find out." Fine," he said, sounding grumpy. " Don't be long. "
4 " It’s fairly standard. Also, I’m fourteen. Also, yourbeard’s stupid.”“Isn’t this fun?” Skulduggery said brightly. “The three of usgetting along so well. "
― Derek Landy , The Faceless Ones (Skulduggery Pleasant, #3)
5 " The workshop door opened and Skulduggery emerged. " Ryan," he said, " stop leaning on my car. "
6 " That was a good day for me," Skulduggery said. " I didn't have to hit anyone. I didn't have to shoot anyone. I just sat around and talked to my good friend and partner, Valkyrie Cain. "
7 " I need a weapon,” Valkyrie muttered.“You’re an Elemental with a Necromancer ring, trained ina variety of martial arts by some of the best fighters in the world,” Skulduggery pointed out. “I’m fairly certain that makes you a weapon.”“I mean a weapon you hold. You have a gun, Tanith has a sword... I want a stick.”“I’ll buy you a stick for Christmas. "
― Derek Landy , Mortal Coil (Skulduggery Pleasant, #5)
8 " It would be fun,” Skulduggery nodded. ”I like kicking Wreath in the face. I haven't had a chance to do it nearly as much as I'd like. "
― Derek Landy , Death Bringer (Skulduggery Pleasant, #6)
9 " So what does that actually mean?''To be honest, Ghastly, I haven't a bull's notion.''Elder Bespoke should be addressed by his full title,' Tipstaff said.'Of course,' Skulduggery said. 'To be honest, Your Highness, I haven't a bull's notion. "
10 " Valkyrie made a face. " Bloody vampires." Ryan sat forward. " That was a vampire? That guy who looked like an accountant?" " We don't talk about vampires," Skulduggery warned." But it was daytime. How could he have been out during the-" " We don't talk about vampires!" Valkyrie said sharply.Ryan shrunk back. " Sorry," he said." Don't worry about it," Skulduggery told him. " Valkyrie used to date a vampire that's "
11 " Violence?" Skulduggery said. " Violence is never the answer, until it's the only answer. "
12 " Valkyrie Cain got out of the passenger side. She zipped upher black jacket against the cold, and joined Skulduggery as hewalked up to the front door. She glanced at him, and saw that he was smiling." Stop doing that,” she sighed.“Stop doing what?” Skulduggery responded in that gloriously velvet voice of his.“Stop smiling. The person we want to talk to lives in the only dark house on a bright street. That’s not a good sign.”“I didn’t realise I was smiling,” he said. They stopped at the door, and Skulduggery made a concerted effort to shift his features. His mouth twitcheddownwards. “Am I smiling now?”“No.”“Excellent,” he said, and the smile immediately sprang back up. "
13 " Skul-man!' he exclaimed as he rushed forward to shake his hand. 'Last I heard you were trapped on a dead world overrun by evil trans-dimensional superfiends!' Skulduggery nodded. 'Just got back. "
― Derek Landy , Dark Days (Skulduggery Pleasant, #4)
14 " Wow," she said. " It's like you're teaching me something and being all wise." " You are not easy to get along with," Skulduggery said. "
15 " Over his shoulder, she saw Skulduggery walk in. " Oh, hell," she muttered. Wreath's smile reappeared. " It's Skulduggery, isn't it?" Over his shoulder, she saw Skulduggery walk in. " Oh , hell," she muttered. Wreath's smile reappeared. " It's Skulduggery, isn't it?" " Please don't annoy him." " Me? When have I EVER annoyed the great Skulduggery Pleasant?" Skulduggery arrived at their table. Wreath smile up at him. " Hello." " I will shoot you in the eye," Skulduggery said.Wreath glanced at Valkyrie. " I think I've annoyed him. "
16 " Do you think we’ll be waiting long?” Valkyrie asked,keeping her voice low.“The last time we were in this building, we accused theGrand Mage of being a traitor,” Skulduggery said. “Yes, I thinkwe’ll be waiting long. "
17 " The traffic warden looked up. " This your car?" " It is," said Skulduggery. The traffic warden nodded. " Very nice, very nice. But you can't park here, day or night." " I wasn't aware of that." " There's a sign right over there." " I didn't think it applied to me." " Why wouldn't it have applied to you?" Skulduggery tilted his head. " Because I'm special." " Don't care how special you think you are, you're parked in a no parking area and as such you're---" " We're here on official police business." The traffic warden narrowed his eyes. " You're Garda? I'm going to need to see some identification." " We're undercover," said Skulduggery. " This is a very important undercover operation which you are endangering just by talking to us." He opened his jacket. " Look, I have a gun. I am Detective Inspector Me. This is my partner, Detective Her." The traffic warden frowned. " Her?" " Me," said Stephanie. " Him?" " Not me," said Skulduggery. " Her." " Me," said Stephanie. " You?" said the traffic warden. " Yes," said Stephanie. " I" m sorry, who are you?" Stephanie looked at him. " I'm Her, he's Me. Got it? Good. You better get out of here before you blow our cover. They've got snipers. "
18 " He looked at Ghastly. " Thoughts?" " I want to kill Sanguine," was the first thing Ghastly said. " And I want to do it slowly, in front of a lot of people. Using a hammer." Skulduggery nodded. " Very healthy. "
19 " The door handle turned. Someone knocked, and a man's voice called, " Uh, hello?" Valkyrie looked at Skulduggery, looked back at the others, looked at Skulduggery again." Hello," Skulduggery said, speaking loudly to be heard over the alarm. " Hi," said the man. " The door's locked." " Is it?" " Yes." " That's funny" said Skulduggery. " Hold on a moment." He reached out, jiggled the handle a few times, then stepped back. " Yes, it's locked. You wouldn't happen to have the key, would you?" There was a delay in response from the other side. " I'm sorry," the man called, " Who am I speaking "
