" Goodness," said my mother. "This is a tight fit. If you girls end up keeping these men longer than usual, we'll need to get a bigger table."
I let it go, but Rachel has more energy than me. "Are all relationships just opportunities for home furnishings, Mom?"
Mom shrugged. "Mostly, Rachel. Yours don't usually last long enough for furniture, though, do they?" She smiled at Richard, as if that made up for what she'd just said. "Maybe you're a keeper, though, Dick."
"Or maybe I'm just a dick," he shot back, "but hopefully I'm a keeper. "

― Abbi Waxman , The Garden of Small Beginnings