" When you learn to ride a bike, ice skate, or downhill ski, the first thing you’re taught is how to stop. It’s an essential skill because if things start heading the wrong direction, you can stop and limit the damage. This same skill is necessary with conversations that have the potential to go off the rails and create lasting damage. When someone blindsides you and says something that triggers you, find the brakes, so you can hit that Pause button.
This can be tricky because, by nature, we often aren’t patient communicators. We expect responses right away and feel compelled to offer the same. I’m inviting you to challenge that and request a little time to gather your thoughts. It can happen faster than you think, so I advise my clients to make simple requests that allow them to Pause. Some examples include:
• Let me catch my breath here.
• Can we find a place to sit down to talk about this?
• Give me a moment to close my door.
• Let me go to the bathroom/let the dog out/fill my coffee, and then I will give you my undivided attention.
The truth is, your brain needs time to overcome some of your initial reactions and access other choices. "

― Darcy Luoma , Thoughtfully Fit: Your Training Plan for Life and Business Success