" you can’t skip the uncertainty of not knowing who you are. You can’t skip the reality of having an uncertain identity. It’s often the hardest part of grief, because unlike shifting feelings that can resolve themselves in minutes or hours, shifting identities can take years to resolve. Sometimes who you are is “suspended” for a very long time before you feel like you’ve found solid footing again. "

― Shelby Forsythia , Permission to Grieve: Creating Grace, Space, and Room to Breathe in the Aftermath of Loss