" Oh, yes you will, Arlo!” Andrea said. “You’ll fall in love with some girl, and you’ll comb your hair to look handsome for her.” “I don’t think so,” I said. “I never comb my hair.” “You’ll get all goo-goo eyes over her, Arlo.” “No way.” “You’ll hold hands with her, Arlo.” “Don’t bet on it.” “You’ll buy her valentines, Arlo.” “Fat chance.” “You’ll kiss her, Arlo.” Ewww! Kissing? Disgusting! "

― Dan Gutman , Mr. Louie Is Screwy! (My Weird School, #20)