" These disciples of Jesus were men who had been led to despair of themselves. At the beginning of their three years of instruction, they had to give up everything they possessed; but only at the end of that time could they begin to give up themselves. They had given up their nets, and their homes, and their friends, and that was right and good to do; but their self, their self-will and their self-desire remained strong all three years! Jesus had often spoken to them about humility, but they did not understand Him. Time after time contention arose among them as to who should be the greatest. At the table at the Last Supper, they were still talking about who would be first among them. They had not given up self. As was made plain more than once, they struggled to live in the Spirit of Jesus! "
― Andrew Murray , Absolute Surrender