QUOTE : Did I not risk incurring the severest of penalties if I insisted on breaking that taboo? But my fear also helped me to understand a lot of things, one of them being that Freud betrayed his own insights for that very reason. Should I follow in his footsteps and revoke the insights I had gained on the frequency and the consequences of cruelty to children, so as to not be attacked and rejected? Could I really have seen something that so many people who unconditionally adulated Freud had not seen: his self-deception? I can remember that whenever I started negotiating with myself trying to find a compromise, or asking myself whether I should not perhaps divulge only part of the truth, physical symptoms were invariably the response. I had digestive problems, I could not sleep, and I suffered from bouts of depression. Once I had realized that there were no more compromises for me, those symptoms disappeared.