" If you want to sound truly English, you must learn to speak the language really badly. It will not be difficult, there are many language schools where they teach you exactly that. (If you are unlucky you may choose one of the old-fashioned ones and be taught English as it should be, and not as it is, spoken.) "

― George Mikes , How to be a Brit: How to be an Alien, How to be Inimitable, How to be Decadent