" Explain your type again.” Ash says. “Let’s define the problem.”
I squint my eyes, because everyone knows that makes you smarter. I didn’t know I had a type, but when I look back at my few exes over the years… yeah, there seems to be a pattern. “Frail-looking, vegetarian or gluten free, intellectual, ironic, good hygiene.”
Sadie and Ash just look at me for a beat. “Thank God we’re helping you.” Ash says. “I mean, what the fuck? Why didn’t we notice this before?”
Sadie is nodding.
Ash says, “so we just need to find someone who’s huge, a carnivore, doesn’t talk, smells manly and… what’s the opposite of ironic?”
“I have no idea. Let’s simplify it. We’re looking for a man, instead of what you’ve been attracted to.”
“What have I been attracted to?”
“Gwyneth Paltrow I’m pretty sure. And every time I see her on TV, I just want to kick her. "

― Sarina Bowen , Man Hands (Man Hands, #1)