" We pursue what we want; then we make sure there are no biblical commands we are violating. In essence, we want to know what God will tolerate rather than what He desires. Maybe we are afraid to ask what will bring Him the most pleasure. Ignorance feels better than disobedience. The good news is that by the grace of God, some of us are seeing our failures now and are training ourselves to prioritize His desires. Scripture is our starting point, not desire or tradition. Rather than thinking of what we would enjoy or asking others what they would like, we ask the simple question, What would please God most? "
― Francis Chan , We Are Church