QUOTE : When I was forty-three, I lost one of my best friends to breast cancer. One of the things I remember most is sitting on the little balcony off her kitchen with her one evening at sunset, looking out over the acres of land so she could see from there, the hills and winding roads and houses nestled into their lots as though settled on their mothers' laps. I remember her saying, "I just want to be here." Earlier that day, I'd sat at the kitchen table and listened while she spoke to someone on the phone, making her own arrangements for a burial plot. She told whomever she was speaking to her name, her address. When she gave her age, she said, "Well, I'm only forty-four. Which is really terrible.