" What is this touching in me?” “Where does this come from in my history?” “Where have I felt this kind of energy before?” “Can I see the pattern beneath the surface?” “What is the hidden idea, or complex, that is creating this pattern?” “Is there something promising magic, Easy Street, seduction, ‘solution’ here, when, as we know, life will always remain raggedy and incomplete?” And, always; “Am I made larger, or smaller, by this path, this relationship, this decision? "

― James Hollis , Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life: How to Finally, Really Grow Up