" The major problem in our lives is to decide and clarify our responsibilities. To truly be committed to a life of honesty, love and discipline, we must be willing to commit ourselves to reality. This commitment, according to Peck, “requires the willingness and the capacity to suffer continual self-examination.” Such an ability requires a good relationship with oneself. This is precisely what no shame-based person has. In fact, a toxically shamed person has an adversarial relationship with himself. Toxic shame—the shame that binds us—is a core part of neurotic and character disordered syndromes of behavior. "

― John Bradshaw , Healing the Shame that Binds You