" And what about the person who’s on the defensive? Initially, this human punching bag is frustrated because no matter what he or she is trying to mirror outward——I’m sorry, I’m confused, I’m scared, I had a good reason for what I did—the ignorant blamer is blind to it. As a result, the person who’s under attack is usually in a state of quiet, barely controlled rage. "

― Mark Goulston , Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone