" Soap wasn't invented until the Romans, who also invented interesting sex. (Since my editor informs me that a gardening book is not a proper venue for discussions of interesting sex, I will go into this topic in more detail when I write my private memoirs, 'A Petunia Named Desire'). "

― Cassandra Danz , Mrs. Greenthumbs: How I Turned a Boring Yard Into a Glorious Garden and How You Can, Too