QUOTE : Don't worry about your orgasm. Don't care about it. You've had a million orgasms in your life. Want only this. Want only total obliteration. In this way too, you are returning to the girl you were -- the girl who didn't care about orgasms, but just wanted to fuck, and fuck, and fuck, without even knowing why. Those adult years of dutifully chasing clitoral orgasms -- they seem alien in retrospect. Now you just want sensation, less definable than orgasm, and weirdly more satisfying, more total.