QUOTE : Any time I found myself wavering- thinking about death or dying or ends or Dad or the ToD -I'd force myself to think about June instead...<br />Think about June. Flip my mind overtop of itself, push everything else out until she's all that's left. June laughing at a joke I'd made, or June speaking, or June existing. This didn't serve, exactly, to balance me on the tightrope; it disintegrated the tightrope. It made it so the tightrope had never existed at all. There was no gravity. I could float there, comfortable, and never worry about the fall ever again.<br />What's the point of living it-<br />June.<br />We're all going to die and the universe is indifferent and-<br />June. Her hands on me and her face close to mine but what does it matter if she, if Dad-<br />June. June sitting in the driver's seat. Dad decomposing in the driver's seat-<br />June. Heaven is June in the driver's seat. Hell is June in the driver's seat. There is only June in the driver's seat. And at night, my consciousness would slip away, repeating that smooth, delicious mantra in my head.<br />There is only June in the driver's seat.