" This phrase did not have the ring of verisimilitude because I am famously bad at math. If I'm in charge of tipping at a restaurant, the waiter will either fall to his knees in gratitude or slash my tires. There ain't no Mr. In Between. "

― Celia Rivenbark , Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank: And Other Words of Delicate Southern Wisdom