" Marsha, wouldn't you rather have the freedom to not have what you want, whatever it is? Wouldn't you feel better if you were free not to have all the things you think you want?" .. Pat was right. We are better off accepting what life has to offer, rather than living under the tyranny of having to have things we don't yet have. This is not to say that we are to be completely passive—not at all. It means that we should strive for important goals, but we must radically accept that we might not obtain them. It is letting go of having to have. And accepting what is. "

― Marsha M. Linehan , Building a Life Worth Living: A Memoir