QUOTE : Dear Lord Wadsworth, esteemed Baron of Somerset,<br /><br />I write to you under great duress. I cannot seem to properly ask to formally court your daughter and ought to be put out of my misery at once. Please send a vicious brood of vampire bats to dispatch me at your earliest convenience. It would clearly be an improvement over this letter…<br /><br />Your daughter’s hopeful yet stupid suitor,<br />Thomas