" The truth is that only a small percentage of Miami's population consists of violent criminals, and the bulk of those are elected officials. The rest of us Miamians are regular people, just like the people in your town: We work hard, try to raise our kids right, and are always ready to help out our neighbors by laying down covering fire when they go outside to get their newspapers. "

― Dave Barry , I'll Mature When I'm Dead: Dave Barry's Amazing Tales of Adulthood