" I went to the doctor," said the woman next to Ethel. "I said to him, 'I've got an itchy twat.'"

[...]
She went on: "The doctor says to me, he goes, 'You shouldn't say that, it's a rude word.'"

[...]

"I says to him, 'What should I say, then, doctor?' He says to me, 'Say you've got an itchy finger.'"

[...]

"He says to me, 'Do your finger itch you all the time, Mrs. Perkins, or just now and again?'"

Mildred paused, and the women were silent, waiting for the punch line.

"I says, 'No, doctor, only when I piss through it. "

― Ken Follett , Fall of Giants (The Century Trilogy, #1)